They say the past shapes our future. Instead, I say that the past can be a learning ground where we can live in the present with contentment to be able to make a brighter future for us. So many hurtful things happened in my past. I bet friends, you have experienced hurt also in the past. Nobody in this world goes through life without being hurt. It is how we deal with the hurt and taking the step to make changes in our lives that matter.
For instance, someone lied to you. And you got hurt, and kept the bitterness inside. That bitterness will just keep building again and again. Unless we learn to forgive that person, and accept that that person lied because that person has their own problems, it is not our fault that that person lied, then we can take charge of our emotions. That we can forgive and move on. And not be upset about it. It would cause us to guard ourselves more, setting up protections for ourselves. It would take time to open up and have the courage to share your experiences. Because vulnerability is there when we trust someone. We can learn to be more wise in choosing who to trust, to open our vulnerability. We would also set boundaries for people who are not in our circles.
For instance, there is 4 spheres of circle. The first is God, second family, third friends, fourth acquaintances and strangers. Maybe it would be different of how you would picture yours, but choose wisely who gets the closest vulnerability you can open up to. So then we can have healthy boundaries for healthy relationships.